Tuesday, January 22, 2019

The boyfriend visited last month for the New Year and we spent our last week of 2018 in a county called Nantou. I've been wanting to visit this county for so long because it's quite a famous tourist spot here in Taiwan. There's a farm called Cingjing Farm where they hold sheep shows and generally just a grassland where you could hang out with a bunch of sheep.

To get to Cingjing Farm, we first need to hop on the High-Speed Rail from Taipei to Taichung, then changed to a bus to get to Puli station where we will stop for around 5-10 minutes before heading our way to the Cingjing Farm. All those commutes took us around 2-3 hours, which was quite tolerable but the ride up to the mountain was a bit rough for me. We arrived at our BnB at around 1 p.m. and we then headed directly to a restaurant just around our BnB to have our long-awaited lunch. After filling up our tummy, we waited for the public bus to get us to the Cingjing Farm which took quite a while since the bus only comes around every one hour, so we have to always keep track on the bus schedule through an app.

When we finally arrived at the Cingjing Farm, unfortunately, we just missed the sheep show; but there were still tons of sheep just chillin' on the grassland and enjoyed their time with the humans.




and of course, I had to take a picture with the sheep.


the boyfie <3
After chilling around the grassland, we went through the traditional market right outside of the farm to have a few snacks. We originally wanted to take a walk on the skywalk but the ticket booth has closed, so we did not get a chance to walk through it. We then wasted our time to wait for the bus (again) to take us back to our BnB.

The next day, we had to wake up super early for the sunrise tour that we're taking. I've been waiting for this moment the most because I've seen pictures of friends who came and the sky just looks amazing with hues of pink and purple. But luck doesn't seem to be on our side on those few days that we're in Nantou. The weather was not very supportive, so we didn't get the chance to see the pink and purple sky, but nevertheless, I still enjoyed the trip (not so much for the boyfriend because he wasn't feeling well that morning due to lack of sleep).








Met a cute corgy and couldn't resist taking a picture with him.
Since we woke up at like 3 a.m., we then took a nap again from 9 a.m. till 12 p.m. Then, we head to a resort called The Old England Resort, which has an architecture like the old English houses to have an afternoon tea/ lunch. But because we did not check the bus schedule in advance, we missed our bus and had to wait for another hour for it (?!!) After considering whether to wait for the bus or walk uphill to the resort, we chose the latter and walked our asses up the hill for around 30 minutes. The walk was worth it though cause then we could fill our tummy with more food.








We learned our lesson and actually checked the bus schedule before finishing our meal so we could get to the bus station right on time. While waiting for the bus, we took tons of photos around the resort and read a few wishes from tourists that hang around the big christmas tree in front of the resort. We also wrote a wish and hang it on the tree because, why not?
When our bus came, we then head to our last stop of the day, that is the Small Swiss Garden. We didn't do much or take too many photos there cause honestly, I was kind of disappointed with the place; let's just say that it did not meet my expectation.


And... we end this trip with hotpot.


To sum it all, the trip was okay. I enjoyed it because I was with my loved one, but there's one downside to this trip that make such a huge impact on the enjoyable factor of this trip, that is, the transportation. They should have more buses going around so people do not have to wait every one hour; every 20-30 mins is more acceptable. But then again, it's on the mountain. The fact that there are public transports available around the area is helpful enough for people who do not travel with private cars. So I guess we should just be grateful instead.







Thursday, January 10, 2019











Photos were taken with my Yashica Electro 35 GX and Nikon Zoom 310 AF.







Sunday, January 6, 2019


Yes, I do realize that it's the new year now, but I couldn't help not posting this post after the trouble I've been through by shooting these flat lay photos. So, I'm just gonna tell you what I've been doing in those last two months of 2018.

1. I started doing yoga again!

I have an on and off relationship with yoga. I started yoga when I was in junior high; my mom wanted her two daughters to learn yoga with her cause she thought it might help perfect our body shape. I then continued doing yoga until my freshmen year of senior high. I stopped because, well, school got busy. Then I started doing it again on my sophomore year of university (I think) until junior year and stopped again on senior year because got to busy earning money.
And now I'm doing yoga again just because I got bored with my routine, that is going to work-came home-eat-sleep-and repeat. So I was thinking on either enroll in a language class (was thinking either Spanish or French) or take a yoga class. I chose yoga because well.... let's admit it, I don't do sport, so I thought by taking a yoga class, it can make me feel a little more healthy.

2. I made my own postcard.


I love taking pictures, and I had tons of pictures in my archive that I don't know what to do about. So when I was thinking on what to do with all the photos that I took, my first thought was making postcards out of them, and so I did! I'm not selling them though, although selling them definitely crossed my mind, but I'm not sure how to start.

3. I finished my 2018 reading challenge right on time.


Okay, this is kind of a cheat. My first goal of the 2018 reading challenge was to read 20 books, but by November, I had only read 8 books. Knowing that I won't be able to finish it by the end of the year, I reduced it to 12 books, and luckily I got to finish reading 12 books by December! Of all those 12 books that I read, my top three would be Love's Executioner, When Breath Becomes Air, and Insomniac City.

4. I ran my first marathon!


It was only 3 km and we ran for like 15 minutes only, but still, it's my first marathon and it's a big deal for me since I dislike running so much, especially when I had to wake up super early just to run. So yeah, was kind of proud of myself by just saying 'yes' to running super early in the morning. Although I'm pretty sure this will be my first and last marathon :')
Sunday, November 11, 2018


Have you ever had that feeling of gratitude that a company actually wants to hire you and you got so excited about it cause this is your first full-time job ever? Yeah, it is a great feeling huh? But then once you actually took the job, your bubble was burst. You were not as excited as the first time you heard the big news; instead, you realized that this job is not for you, and you've been struggling since the day you got in and you did everything to feel better and get you through every second of being in the office, but you never succeded.

Yep, that's how I've been feeling for the past 4 months since I got employed.

So, before we got into the whole I-feel-so-shitty-everyday-I-just-want-to-quit-my-job shebang, let me fill in the gap about what is really going on with me after graduating from uni.

I graduated with an Educational Psychology and Counseling major back in June, and I got myself a job at a local travel agency in Taipei last July! You probably wonder why I took a job that is very different to my major? Well, it's because I have this stubborn tendency to stay in Taipei for another year before going back to Indonesia just cause I like it here in Taipei. Also, the companies in Taipei pay more than companies in Indonesia. "Well then why didn't you get a job in Taipei related to Psychology instead?" That's because I can't. People who graduated from my major are expected to work in school as a school counselor, and I would love to do that too someday but I can't do it here in Taiwan because I am a foreigner. So yeah, I need to take other jobs out of my field, and I chose travel agency because I thought anything related to travel might be fun. But what did I know back then right?

After I received the mail from my current company saying that they want to hire me, I have mixed feelings about this big news. First, I am of course excited and grateful that I landed a job right after graduation, and also the fact that I can make my own money and feed myself without depending on my parents made me so proud of myself (give self a pat on the back). Then, after the excitement slowly fades away, the feeling of uncertainty creeps in; uncertain of what I actually want and like to do, uncertain that choosing to stay in Taipei for another year doing something out of my field instead of pursuing something Psychology related is the right decision. And finally, the feeling of sadness got to me. Sad that I couldn't have the privilege to enjoy seasonal breaks anymore, sad that I have to end my status as a student and enjoy the student dicounts, also sad that I only have like 2-3 weeks of freedom left before becoming a full time employee for god knows how long.

To conclude, you could safely say that there are more sadness than happiness upon hearing the news.

On the first week of starting the job, I was sad because my family and boyfriend had to go back home and I am stuck here. Also, I felt kind of homesick. (Not a great way to start your first job, huh?) But I eventually got through it. With the help of my friendly colleagues in the office, I managed to suck it up and actually enjoy my working days.... well only for a few weeks. Until about a month ago, I realized how much I dislike this job (was intending to say 'hate' but hate is a strong word and I don't want to make this job sounds so bad, so.) and I wanted nothing else but to quit and pursuing what I love most, that is Psychology. You might say "well, quit then! what are you waiting for?". I hope my situation is as easy as that, but no. I am stuck here in Taiwan until June 2019 because I had a contract for the house that I'm currently staying in. If I was to live by myself, I could easily just break the contract and pay more money to cover it up but I can't do that since I'm living with two more friends. I couldn't just dump them and go back to Indonesia or somewhere else and let the both of them paying the rent of three people, it's just unfair to them. "So I can't get out of this country until next year, what can I do to make myself feel better then?", I thought. "Why not quit your current job and find a new one?", I said to myself. "Yeah, you could do that but what about your visa? You do not have working visa yet, and your current visa expires this December. You should at least get the working visa first then bolt", I reminded myself.  Yes, that would be the perfect decision to make, but how could I do that to my team mate who wanted to quit first? He had been talking about quitting since I got in and since our team is only consists of three people, I couldn't quit knowing that he derserves it more that I am. If I quit first, then he couldn't, and it's not fair for him. So what can I do then? "Well, you could just suck it up and wait until June 2019."

There folks, that's my story of how I wanted to quit so bad but couldn't find the right time to do it. Pathetic, huh? If I were to go back in time and chose between staying in Taipei for another year or go back to Indonesia to pursue my master in Psychology, I would choose Psychology more than anything. But the sad news is that I couldn't go back in time and I am stuck in this shitty situation. I know I complain too much. People be like "she should be grateful instead that she already got a job" but I can be selfish too sometimes right? I deserve better. I deserve to make myself happy, and if by being happy I need to be selfish, then the hell to that.



I have been feeling super unmotivated lately to the point that I feel like I have no purpose in waking up anymore. Starting a new day don't excite me like it used to, and I found myself counting the days to weekends and dreads Sunday nights knowing that the next day is Monday. I just really do not enjoy the life I'm living right now. I kept scrolling through pinterest to find the motivational quotes that used to pump me up and get me going, but now, reading those quotes don't even help no more. Nevertheless, I still find the quote "Before Alice got to Wonderland, she had to fall" very intriguing as I imagined myself falling right now only to be in my own Wonderland soon. (hopefully, fingers crossed). I just need to have positive thoughts while I'm falling right? Right. Also, how accurate the quote above "growth is painful, change is painful. But nothing is as painful as staying stuck somewhere you don't belong" is to my situation right now?? I've been feeling stuck for a while now and I just really want to make a change from my current situation. I did try a few stuff that people said to be helpful when you are feeling in a rut, like saying "yes" more, go meet new people, go out often, etc. But none of that helps, in fact, they give me more anxiety, especially the saying "yes" more. I tried to say "yes" more often when my colleague asked me if I wanted to hang out with them and their friends (who are strangers to me) on weekends, and making that decision was a mistake. I didn't enjoy the time I'm out with them and I just couldn't help but feel awkward. I guess I need to come out with a few of my own ways to get out of a rut.

What do you guys usually do when you feel stuck? I would really love to get a few advice from you guys. xx
Sunday, November 4, 2018


Last September, I had the opportunity to get away from the city and explore a small island just outside of Taiwan, called the Orchid Island.

Honestly, I wasn't planning on going at first because since the mid of September, things got quite a bit hectic in the office and I was spending too much money on some useless shit that I almost gone broke. But then I thought to myself that I actually am in need of a little getaway from the routine, and I couldn't be happier that I actually went. Those three days were the best days that I've ever had since I started working full time.

Orchid Island is so amazingly beautiful and relaxing, except for the price of the food tho. We just strolled around the whole island with our rented scooter and stopped at places that are decent for taking photos or just places that have the best landscape views.

Since I started my first job, I wasn't in the happiest state, all I could think of is how I hated where I am now and kept finding ways to make myself feel happy again, but I couldn't. However, being in that small island where I know nobody and everybody just seems so friendly, it sort of relaxed and calmed me. I felt happy, free and relieved. I was even thinking of going back in the near future and spend like 2 weeks , or even a month there. I even managed to wake up at 5 a.m. for two days just to see the sunrise on our bnb's balcony. I just couldn't get enough of this island.

After coming back from this trip, I knew that this life right now is not for me. I knew that I should make a change. But there are a few reasons that holds me down right now, and I couldn't do anything about it, except to wait. All I could do now is to wait patiently for the best time to make the change and while waiting, I should think of things to do that could make this waiting seems worthy. Although I am still striving for better days, but at least I knew that it will come and I'll be ready then for a new beginning.